To all of my readers (cuz I know there is actually a plethora of you out there, just for some reason you're not showing up in my view count thing...) Ahem To all of my readers, if you don't believe in God, I hope you will still read my blog, and learn about why I believe in God, and why I live the way I do. If you don't believe in God and it really irritates you to read blogs which refer to him... I still hope you will read my blog.
So, the other day I was in Sobeys grocery shopping, and when I left I walked past one of the Salvation Army Christmas Kettles. After I walked past it I asked myself, why do I always walk past these things? I discovered that, oddly enough, my main reason for walking by is embarrassment. Why the heck would I embarrassed to give to charity? For some reason the thought of stopping in the middle of a doorway, having to dig through my purse for my wallet, and then through my wallet for change, and then try and get it into the little slot (slots are such a challenge for me!) makes me break out into a cold sweat. So really, is that a good reason not to give to charity? I don't think so. I think about all the sad news announcements about charities not reaching their donation goals and feel very guilty. So I says to myself I says "Kaitlyn, there will be other kettles. The next time you come across one you will put money in."
About half an hour later I was leaving Canadian Tire and, what do you know? Another kettle. Now's my chance! I'm walking closer, closer, closer, and... I pass by. I hear the pathetic "jingle jingle" as the door shuts behind me, and I've missed my chance again. Even the immense pain in my conscience is not enough to get me to turn around. "There will be others," I tell myself. "You will have another chance!"
About half an hour later I am at the cash register at Independent. I have just paid for my order when the cashier from the next till says to me "Did you get that goat cheese, dear?" Lo and behold, I had goat cheese in my cart, hidden under my purse, and I had been about to leave with it! Embarassed, I paid for the goat cheese. As I'm headed out the door, guess what I see? Another kettle. Already flustered by the goat cheese situation, I am clearly incapable of stopping, opening my wallet, searching for change, and getting it in the slot.
As I walk through the automatic doors I nearly barf all over the linoleum floors. I make myself sick. I am a despicable human being. Ever heard of someone being a Judas? Well I'm a Peter. Three times... cockadoodledoo!!!
I get to my car and am searching in my purse for my phone when I feel a mysterious object in my purse. I pull it out, and, horror of horrors, I discover that I HAVE STOLEN something! A stick of organic, paraben free deodorant, no less. Apparently, I had put it in my purse after checking to make sure it smelled good (it does, by the way). It takes me about 2 seconds to realize I am going back in to pay for my deodorant. I march myself into the Independent and announce: "I stole this, and now I would like to pay for it."
You better believe that after all that I PUT MONEY IN THE STUPID KETTLE!
Just another little story about why I believe in God. He knows us, He knows our hearts, and He knows what it will take to get us to act. I need to be a more giving person. Clearly.
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